Archive for January, 2009

our sweetest magoo is “in a cycle” right now… i am researching cyclic vomiting syndrome, which has been mentioned to us before by jackson’s feeding therapist whose daughter suffers from this as well. the zofran that treats jackson’s belly helps with the cycles that he is now going through, but his bad days are just a bear for all of us, especially him.
according to jackson’s feeding therapist back in j’ville, at the onset of any sort of cold, virus, or something new (in jackson’s case, his teeth), the stomach is triggered since it is his weakness and vomiting occurs. anything that could potentially upset jackson’s system just sucks… he’s so sensitive, and his poor little stomach is so sensitive that anything making him uncomfortable or not feel well (again, his teeth) results in vomiting.
and it’s not just normal person vomit… this is crazy, mass puke-ige, and not to be witnessed by the sympathetic puker, as you will also start to retch and vomit yourself.
on jackson’s bad days, he’ll have his medicine in the morning, take about 4 ounces of a bottle and then start the show. a cycle for him can last anywhere from 1 single vomit session to multiple days. the key is to make jackson as comfortable as possible, which is where the zofran comes in really handy because it is such a strong anti-nausea/anti-vomiting drug and the dosage can be adjusted according to jackson’s needs.
so that’s where we are today… his teeth are bothering him so much that his whole little system is upset, and jackson “tells” us this by puking his guts all over us.

as for me and last night’s pampered chef party… a decent amount of wine was consumed by your’s truly, and $72.50 was spent on an assortment of kitchen accessories (i am told that this is a good deal). the chicks who attended were all about 10 years older than i am, with about 3 school age children a piece, and consumed much more wine than i did. (is that what happens when you have more than 1 child?) i was an outsider, but i usually am at navy wife stuff. after walking back upstairs to my apartment, i wrote my friend (another non navy navy wife) to dish to her… i told my friend that i felt like a pinata (stay with me on the analogy. i know i had a lot of wine, but it makes sense, i swear!) i was the colorful, “different” person at this party with my tattoos and youth. and when people (ladies especially) are met with something new and possibly strange, the daggers come out and the defenses go up. so like the pinata, i started getting wacked left and right “BAM BAM BAM”… with judgment. “so your son has what disorder now?” and “how many tattoos do you have?” and “you had orders for japan and what happened?” and eventually someone jabs the pinata to the point of it breaking, and so i broke, with anecdotes of my puking non-eating son, and feeding tube stories. and then they realized that i wasn’t scary, but sweet.

my in-laws arrive today for a birthday extravaganza weekend/superbowl party. paul’s cousin and her little one are sharing a birthday weekend that includes the following: a ladies luncheon tomorrow, and a super bowl/cooper bowl on sunday complete with a petting zoo and a mexican restaurant’s catering.

let’s hope jackson’s cycle ends sooner rather than later…

jackson’s top 4 (yes 4) teeth are cutting his gums. the tooth that is to the right of his front top two teeth broke the skin yesterday, and now i’m just waiting for the other three. when his bottom front two teeth came through, they did so together. it was like a beautiful synchronized swimming routine. one major scream fest produced two teeth. while all 4 of these top suckers are right there and just to the point of driving him looney, only one has broken through so far. he is constantly noisy… and i can’t even say “fussy” because that just doesn’t cut it. “fussy” is a term to use when jackson just isn’t getting his way and wants to let you know he doesn’t like that he’s not getting his way. this noise that he is now producing, takes me back to Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets. reason being that jackson has turned into a mandrake. yes, that annoying as hell plant that when you pull it out of its pot, it squeals and writhes and makes this noise that just says, “I HATE YOU AND I WANT YOUR EARS TO HATE ME BECAUSE I HATE YOU.” today that is my son. i love him, but today he is a mandrake.

in other news, i have a “party” this evening. i don’t normally attend these type of functions (rachel, i hear you laughing) but given that my son is currently a mandrake, i’m attending tonight’s festivities. the chick who lives below us (and mind you, all people who live in our complex are navy as we live in the on-base apartments) is having a pampered chef party tonight. now, i don’t know who or what the “pampered chef” is, nor do i surround myself with navy wives on a regular basis, but supposedly there is wine involved… and you know, where there is wine… you will find me. i’ll be the one standing in the corner, uncorking myself another bottle.

maybe it’s the dreary ice storm that has struck annapolis… maybe it’s the all consuming life of a parent… whatever it is, it keeps me locked inside our apartment, dreaming of escape plans and blogging about nothing exciting.
i’m looking into becoming a dot com… jacksondoesnteat.com more specifically. but i have very little, if no time, to accomplish actually setting up this dot com. jackson’s top 4 teeth are breaking the skin as i write this, and he’s screaming like a banchi (banchy? whatever). the child has been in my arms for the last 3 straight days because that’s all he wants when his teeth hurt. this leads me back to my point of being able to accomplish next to nothing.
back to the dot com… my friend is a dot com and i called her the other night asking about how i can become a dot com, how do i build my site, etc. as she shared her insights with me, i googled my way through this topic and basically came out with no more knowledge than i had going in. the nugget of info i did take from my dot com convo with her was that since i have ads on my blog, i shouldn’t have to pay the monthly fee of having a dot com. that sounded lovely as i currently hate any and all monthly fees that are in my life and want to destroy them.
so, help!!! basically what i’m looking for is to have my blog be a website. i need the domain name rights so that i can have jacksondoesnteat.com and rock the nation. i don’t want the monthly fee if i can avoid it by selling out with advertisements. i’m ok with that, as i have sold my soul many times before. so if you are experienced in this, and can help me become a dot com, please email or comment me and advise. your reward will be in heaven.

i have a few things to post about, so consider this a hodge podge of how the last 24 hours have gone for us…

numero uno: jackson’s latest obsession is with red, as you can see from the pictures. jackson reaches for red all the time, pulls his fur, and wants to pretend like red is the stuffed lion he wrestles in his crib. and so this morning, we let jackson ride red like a pony… because that’s just what you do when a child is that obsessed with an animal; you let them ride the animal.

numero dos: last night’s sleepover didn’t happen. we brought jackson home last night. the drop off had gone fine, the 10 minutes post-drop off went very not fine, and the three hours after that went even worse. jackson was traumatized, terrified, and refused to eat. the first two of those three things, i think i could handle… yeah, so it’s a different place, different people, different stuff. but the refusing to eat, i can’t handle. you guys know i can’t handle that. so after getting the call that jackson wouldn’t eat, paul and i brought him home. damnit. we need a babysitter up in this piece asap! research on that will commence this week.

numero tres: mom mailed (yes, in the regular mail) me a story from people magazine. the story is of a single dad, matt, whose wife, liz, died 27 hours after giving birth to their adorable baby girl, maddy. matt’s blog has been added to my links of “where nic reads” and is definitely a blog you should check out… with a box of kleenex. his story is heart-warming, tragic, and beautifully painful.

we have a playdate/sleepover scheduled for jackson tonight. the playdate this afternoon is with paul’s cousin and her two boys, who we love and adore. the sleepover will be at paul’s aunt’s house tonight so that jackson can have a crib instead of a pack-n-play. they are totally doing us a solid by taking jackson, and we are so appreciative. we are having the rest of our belongings from storage delivered this afternoon, and having the uninterrupted time to complete our move will be so helpful (not to mention that this means paul and i can have an evening as adults.)
earlier this week, i posted about wanting a life, needing a sitter, and wanting to coexist as a mother and “woman of the world,” as my grandmother would say. my opportunity to do this is today… tonight… and now i’m scared.
i’m not scared at all for jackson, nor is paul. his cousin and aunt are MORE than capable and love our sweet boy dearly. we trust them completely, knowing they will be so cognizant of jackson’s medications, his little quirks, and his every need. he will be in such good hands, and that is comforting to know. this will also be such a great playdate for jackson with (almost) 3 year old cooper, and 9 month old mason. jackson needs socialization… bla bla bla…
i know all of this, really i do, but damnit this is hard. my emotions go absolutely nuts when i think that paul and i will wake up tomorrow morning without our little magoo in his crib. i will cry. seriously, i will.
we have left him before, with my parents, a few times. each time we have left him overnight has been because paul and i had an event, a wedding, a “thing” to go to. for some reason, this feels different. granted, we have the rest of our move to tend to this afternoon, but justifying sending our son away for that and for an evening to ourselves just doesn’t seem right. right?
paul and i debated this last night until nearly midnight, knowing that jackson wakes up at 6:30… and we’re hurting now because of it. more coffee please! these plans for jackson have been made for a couple of days, and i’ve let it all marinate in my head for a couple of days, but now we’re at THE day.
so do we or don’t we? (ps- we are anyway… but would still love the input.)

after posting my letter to my precious boy, i busted him for feeding our 85 pound lab… at least jackson is learning to share.

Dear Jackson,
It blows my mind to know that you have been a part of my life (in some form or another) for the last 18 months… year and a half… 9 months in my body, and now 9 months out of my body. You continue to amaze me on a minute by minute basis. In honor of your 9 month birthday, my sweet magoo, I am posting my 9 favorite things about you…

1. The fact that EVERYTHING is your’s and your’s alone. If Mom has a cup in her hand, it’s for you (even though it may be a cup of water for me). If Dad has the remote in his hand, it too is for you (even though you’d prefer to put it in your mouth than change the channel).
2. Your smiles. You have about eleventy-million of them, and I am constantly learning that you develop even more every day. Some are grins… some are open-mouthed-hyena smiles… some are shy, flirty smiles that you got from your dad. They are all precious and I enjoy every single one of them every single day.
3. The conversation you are having with yourself in your crib right now. I am listening to you on the monitor, and laughing at you talk and babble to something… someone… yourself… I dunno, but it’s hilarious.
4. Your curiosity and how it grows with each new thing (object, person) that you come in contact with. Watching you watch the world is a miracle to me.
5. The ferocious way you pull Red’s fur… and the fact that we let you do it though we know it scares him. You are fearless and unashamed, as you should be.
6. The way you burrow into my neck when you’re sleepy, as if that’s the warmest, softest place you can imagine falling asleep in.
7. Your sleepy noises that include purring and sighing. I think I love them so much because your dad makes the same exact noises as he falls asleep… total relaxation.
8. When you look at either your dad or I with that “What?! Why are you looking at me like I just pooped in my pants?” look… guilty as sin, but knowing it just makes your dad and I laugh out loud.
9. What you have taught me about unconditional love. You teach me new things everyday, but this lesson in love has been my favorite one of all.

Here’s to you on your 9 month birthday Jackson Ray!
I love you endlessly,
Mom