“rape rape”
dear whoopi,
you sicken me. you make me sad for women and men alike. you make me sad for humanity as a whole. you make me sad for those who have been brave and strong enough to endure and come to eventually embrace the label of “rape survivor.”
and quite honestly, you horrify me with the following clip…
even though roman polanski pled guilty to having sex with a minor, HE HAD SEX WITH A MINOR… WHICH EQUALS STATUTORY RAPE.
RAPE, WHOOPI…. “RAPE RAPE,” according to you.
as a rape survivor myself, one who has publicly and proudly shared my story of being drugged and raped with the world wide web, i find myself ashamed to say that i was once a fan of your’s… a fan of your sucesses… a fan of you as a woman.
and now, you disgust me.
please tell me what you define “rape rape” as… i’m just curious. indulge me please.
your ignorance regarding the issue of rape sounds as though some forms of rape are worse than others, which makes me wonder a couple of things about you…
1) have you ever been raped?
2) who do you think you are to judge those who have?
3) what criteria must one endure in order to be “raped” and not “rape raped”?
4) must there be weapons involved?
5) in order to be “rape raped” should there be more than one rapist?
6) does a pregnancy need to result from said “rape rape”?
i would LOVE to say more about how disgusted i am with you and how you make me want to wretch in my toilet, knowing that ignorant people like you, ignorant WOMEN like you exist in this world… but i am a better woman than you. i am a stronger woman than you.
and i will NEVER watch “The View” again, so long as your ignorant ass is on it.
september 26th marked my 9 year “suckiversary” since i was RAPED.
not “rape raped,” whoopi….
I WAS RAPED.
i am a survivor. and now, i have survived what i NEVER in my wildest dreams could’ve imagined… judgment and condescension from another woman regarding rape.
**********
edited wednesday sept. 30
i urge you all to click here and read my friend’s take and support her as a survivor in the way you have all embraced and supported me.
120 Responses to “rape rape”
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What an IDIOT. I’m so glad you wrote this post, I didn’t catch The View that day but I did watch the clip and HOLY CRAP, she needs to either lose her job OR apologize publicly – even still I won’t be watching The View again.
Nic, I’m really sorry about what happened to you.
I’d also like to add that Polanski’s victimwas drugged and told him NO, over and over again, and yet he continued. That’s rape, no matter how old someone might be.
Whoopi has serious issues. She needs to shut her yap.. She disgusts me.
Can’t stand the view already.. Will email ABC as well..
As another survivor, I am appalled.
xoxo
I’m inclined to agree with PsychMama on this. I don’t think Whoopi was saying it wasn’t rape. The ‘rape-rape’ thing was a specific discussion of what he plead guilty to vs what he did / they want to charge him with. What he plead guilty to is not what we consider the ‘rape’ charge, thus the ‘rape-rape’ comment.
Is what he did rape? Absolutely. Do I think he should be charged with it? You bet. Is that what he plead guilty to and did jail time for? No, it’s not. And I think that was the point Whoopi was trying to make.
I never watch The View because all that noise gives me a headache. Whoopie G sure isn’t giving me any incentive to start, that’s for sure. It’ about time Roman P served his time, he’s a criminal.
SO, maybe she was trying to clarify the charges… I dunno. MY issue is WHY THE HELL WOULD SHE BE SO CONCERNED ABOUT DEFENDING A RAPISTS??? OK, a “raperape-ist” or even someone who’d have sex with a minor?
As I watched, chills ran up and down my entire body. Why would anyone work so hard to defend someone who hurt a child… who CARES what other countries think about how old a child should be.
It’s awful. I am deeply saddened and fearful for the protection of my children because people in our own society (people with louder voices than me) MAY have influence.
Thank you for posting this. A heart-hug to you knowing you have earned “survivor” You are incredible strong and should not have to endure slaps in the face such as this.
I walk with you here.
I applaud your strength in sharing your story. I also think Whoppi along with the rest of the media who think this wasn’t a big deal or a real rape are dung heaps!
I can’t watch it. I won’t watch it. However, I agree with you 100%. And I love you. That is all.
Here is my thinking on the “rape, rape” He pleaded guilty to statutory RAPE. That is still RAPE. A 13 you girl, drugged or not, does not have the mental capacity to make the choice to have sex with a grown man. From what I gather he was arrested for fleeing the law. If he fled what he deemed to be a severe punishment, he is a criminal. End of story.
I think if he committed the same crime today he would be charged with child molestation and would be a pariah.
*joins the standing ovation*
I will write letters to the show’s producers, sign petitions, anything you want. I can’t believe that there hasn’t been more of a backlash after that comment. The ENTIRE audience of The View is women, for the most part. People should have booed. People should have turned off their t.v.s. People should be up in arms over this. If one in three women will be sexually assaulted in their live time, think of how many rape survivors were just invalidated by Whoopi’s ignorant comment. Love ya, girl. ~Susan
You tell her. You tell the world.
You are an inspiration.
Rape may have varying degrees of intensity, but rape is rape whether it’s drugging, manipulating a child to have sex with you, or physically forcing yourself on an unwilling person. All would seem exceedingly traumatic and all are the ultimate violation. And from what I’ve understood, children who have had this happen to them often blame themselves for it. As far as I’m concerned, it all falls under one category. I guess to whoopi, “rape rape” means “real rape,” so I can only assume she doesn’t feel that this scenario falls within those confines. Anyone think she would feel differently if it was her daughter that this happened to? She’d be screaming “rape rape” from atop The View meeting table.
I was never her biggest fan but now I am convinced my decision to not watch her is justified. She is a pig in the truest sense of the word. Not only is Roman Polanski a rapist, but Hollywood is quick to forget that not only was his victim a 13 y.o. child, but he also DRUGGED her. I’m writing a letter to ABC.
Excellent post.
I have been disgusted at the support of Polanski this week.
Thank you for writing with courage and clarity!
I watched the clip. What a damn shame that Whoopi thinks Statutory rape is different than rape that occurs when the parties involved are over 18. It doesn’t freaking matter! It’s still rape! It’s still a crime. Do the crime, serve the time!
I haven’t watched The View in years and never will again. I’m glad you posted this hon.
I wonder if she thinks the sky is purple too?
Pingback: Polanski, Whoopi and Rape Apologism « After Silence
Wow, I’m shocked by the stupidity that came out of Whoopie’s mouth.
Thanks for sharing, and being brave enough to share your story.
Thank you for standing up and saying what the rest of us were thinking.
Whoopi also offended some Europeans by saying they think of sex differently than Americans. They may not have the same views of the age of consent that Americans do, but the point is moot. This young girl did not consent and with no consent, it IS RAPE!! yes Whoopi…even in Europe (rolly eyes & red in the face). For heavens sake… NO is NO !!
Amen. I’m still reeling from that video since I saw it yesterday. You’ve said exactly what I would love to say to her face. Good for you.
That bastard should be castrated, without medication. Raping a child (or is that rape-raping?) to me is one of the most horrific crimes one could commit. I am glad that the prisoners tend to agree with me, child molesters are the lowest of the low in jail and are treated as such. For Whoopi to be able to stand there and argue semantics at best, severity of rape at the worst, not only as a woman but as a woman who has had kids and now has a 13 year old granddaughter is very disturbing. Rape of any kind is a crime and celebrities should never essentially endorse it or try and lessen the perceived severity of it!
my “favorite” part of the clip is in the beginning where whoopi points out that they were having sex prior to the incident. as if that discounts the fact that he RAPED her later on.
guess what whoopi? i was raped by a guy who i was in a 6 yr relationship with. from age 19-25 we were together, consentually. but one day he pinned me down and forced himself upon me.
does that count as “rape rape” in your book?
i don’t care that today you clarified by saying you were just trying to get the facts straight. your apology is not accepted…if you even really apologized. i kind of missed the i’m sorry.
you can’t take back the fact that you used the term rape rape, as if one horrifying event “counts” more than another.
i’m outraged and disgusted by you, whoopi, and you should be ashamed of yourself.
Whoppi was not giving HER personal opinion of the matter, she was stating for the record what the charges were.
When she said “I don’t believe it was rape rape” she was speaking of the charges, not her personal belief of the situation.
Proud of you my friend. You have a voice and it should be heard. Loud and clear. xo
She is absolutely disgusting.
I don’t know what more Whoopi needs to know about “the facts” to know that rape is rape is rape. That man was an adult. That girl was a child. Regardless of anything else, that’s rape.
Oh, wow. I’m so swamped with work that I had no idea about this.
Good for you, Nic. Proud of you.
Calm your ass down. She was just saying the facts, and trying to say things correctly, and tell you all what he was being charged for- not the “truth” of what he did. She didn’t want to tell you all that he was being charged for rape, because he ISN’T. She’s stating the facts of what the law is giving to him, not the facts of what he did in reality.
God, you all are idiots.
Thank you for standing up for us. RAPE is RAPE. Regardless of HOW MUCH the victim protested, regardless of what anyone else *thinks* the victim should or should not have done, the PERP should NEVER have done what he did, and that alone is what needs to be put on trial.
this makes me so sick. So, because I was raped at 17 by a “boyfriend” it wasnt really rape? it was rape rape.. since I was drunk, it doesnt count, right? thanks for clarifying that for me whoopi, because as I was being raped I sure as hell was wondering wtf your opinion was! For the rest of my life I will remember this. i will remember the hurt, the pain. My husband will remember the crying, the nights that I couldnt, wouldnt allow him to touch me. the dreams that fill my head during the darkest of nights, the ones that rattle me, shake me and make me remember back 12 years ago, sure as hell remember it being RAPE and nothing else. I never knew that rape had so many different classifications. Im sure all the other women in the world that have been raped dont see it as “rape rape” either. thanks for making us all feel like shit, making us all angry, hurt and relive the horrible event all over again, because of your ignorance! Whoopi, you are a disgrace to women everywhere, even if they have not been raped!
Wow Miki. Just wow. How exactly is being outraged by a person trivializing CHILD RAPE an overreaction? I just read the entire story about his trial. He is a child molester. Plain and simple. I understand that 30+ years ago he managed to plead to lesser charges, but he ADMITTED to having sex with a child, full well knowing she was 13. The reason he was arrested is because he is a FUGITIVE from the law.
I’m glad you put this out there, Nic. Noone who hasn’t been raped can know what the words and connotations spewed from Whoopi meant to you. We just don’t know. I just don’t know.
One thing is for certain. Rape is rape. There is no in between.
I’m proud of you for writing this.
I am shocked and disgusted and saddened by Whoopi’s view on this. I bet she’d be singing a whole other song if it was her 13-year-old grand-daughter.
Nic, you’re fucking awesome. Thanks for using your voice for those of us who haven’t found our own yet…
XOXO
Let me say I think there is no such thing as ‘rape light’ but saying that statutory rape is ‘rape’ isn’t true in all cases. My best friend was charged with it because he was 18 and his girlfriend wasn’t. Her parents turned him in on his birthday, they never liked him much. THAT is not rape. That is consensual sex between peers. That clearly isn’t the case with this director, but not all statutory rape is rape.
Second, she was clarifying his charges. It wasn’t rape like adult on adult violence rape, it was statutory rape which has varied meanings. Rape, as an adult victim is a very different meaning. Statutory, you always wonder is he a perv or did he date someone in high school who was younger? I think all these people who agree are being too sensitive. I think you’re allowing your ‘survivor’ status color your view. She was clarifying his CHARGES and what he plead guilty to. At no point does she say “oh sex with a minor and statutory rape aren’t REAL rape”. This is an unfair vilification of Whoopi.
All that said by someone who was ‘statutory raped’ in high school because I dated an older boy. I’m glad you survived and are strong enough to share your story.
I just read ‘your story’ and I couldn’t comment there. I can barely see for all the tears that are clouding my vision and know that this is not one/millionth of the pain you live with. I am so sorry that this happened to you, or happens to anyone, and for all the trauma that went through after the fact in the ‘investigation’. You are very brave to put your story out there and I can’t imagine how much you are helping others that you will never meet or know. I admire your courage.
Jenni, I was stating the point of what Whoopi was SAYING, not what is TRUE. She was trying to explain to everyone what the law is saying he did, not the truth of what he did.
Pay attention, there might be a quiz.
OK, I’ve seen this several times in the comments, so I’m going to say this again. RP was NOT convicted of rape. He was convicted of “unlawful sexual intercourse with a minor”.
THAT was the point Whoopi was trying to make.
Is it ‘essentially’ rape. Absolutely. But it’s not a charge with the word ‘rape’ in it. Telling the world on national television that someone was convicted of statutory rape when they weren’t will get you a nice libel suit. All she was trying to do is clarify that one point, not defend the guy.
Thank you, PrincessJenn.
Wow – I totally missed this. Don’t get to see The View much with work. But I am appalled. There is no grey line to be defended when a 45 year old has sex with a 13 year old. If rape is, as the psychologists tell us, based in power – there is no more fitting example than a 45 years old adult manipulating a 13 year old. Whoopi’s rape rape comments are shameful to indicate otherwise.
And here’s another thing Whoopi – what the other half of the world thinks about our laws and societal beliefs is quite irrelevant. Our laws stand and in the US, you get tried for acts against children. He broke the law, violated a child and should be punished.
Everyone has already said what was going through my mind, except the person that defended Whoopi up there and tried to clarify her asinine comments.
Bravo Nic! I’ll drink my beer in honor of this post tonight!
There’s such a long line of people who can speak to a rape story. My first time was rape. Was I dating him? yes. Was a minor? yes Was he NOT a minor? yes Did I start off kissing him? yes. Did my teenage mind think I might want to have sex with him EVENTUALLY? yes. But that day, at that time, when my hands with my hands pinned down did I beg him over and over to stop? YES! There is NO such thing as “rape rape”.
My advice to Whoopi is to THINK before you SPEAK.
Rape is rape. All women need to stand up and say that ANY rape is wrong.You are a brave gal for sharing your story.
To clarify – Whoopi also said “Would I want my 14 year old daughter having sex with somebody, not necessarily? Is it rape? I don’t know the answer to that.” And “we’re a different kind of society. We see things differently. The world sees 13-year olds and 14-year olds in the rest of Europe… not everybody agrees with the way we see things…”
So tell me again that she was explaining charges to all of us nimwits.
THANK YOU, Princess Jenn for saying again (and clarifying) what I was trying to say about 40 comments ago.
To summarize: Whoopi, me, Princess Jenn, Miki & Jessica **NOT** defending RP or what he did. Clarifying legal terms & how they’re used ONLY.
All of this worth a Hate-Whoopi-Bandwagon? Don’t think so.
I just nearly threw up in my mouth. I can not believe Whoopi. I was already no longer a fan of hers for things she has said previously, but this really sealed the deal.
I love reading idiotic comments.
And I thought “sex with a minor” was automatically rape? A minor by law can’t consent and sex without consent is rape, no?
So what is Whoopi’s distinction here?
Amy, it’s not Whoopi’s distinction. It’s the American law that has the distinction. There are several different levels of ‘rape’ unfortunately. It makes things very cloudy and vague. But the fact is ‘unlawful sexual intercourse with a minor’ is a different charge than ‘statutory rape’ in the American judicial system.
Is it the same thing in the minds of the people? I would say so. Like everyone is saying: Rape is rape. But the courts don’t treat it as such.
Kelly -
She was “clarifying charges” when she used the term “rape rape.”
I think Whoopi’s point with the part about her 14 y/o daughter was that she may not want her to have sex with someone, but having sex at 14 (and RP’s CHARGE/PLEA of “sexual misconduct with a minor) might or might not be rape. That is, plenty of 14 y/o’s decide to have sex, but that doesn’t make it rape. Again, I think she was referring to the legal definition of “sexual misconduct with a minor” and ultimately saying “I don’t know the answer to whether or not it was rape” = wise admission that she/we may not have all the facts and it’s for the courts to decide.
Was she defending RP? No. Was she saying he shouldn’t stand trial for charges? NO. Was she saying let’s think objectively about this instead of responding with visceral emotions? YES.
Again, I think her words about the way the “rest of the world” sees this was in response to the large international support RP has been getting and trying to think objectively about why others might be standing up for him.
Was she agreeing with them? NO. Was she saying there might be other opinions that we don’t agree with? Yes.
Am *I* Disgusted with RP and what he did? ABSOLUTELY. Completely hoping that he has to face all legal charges just as anyone else would.
You think I don’t understand b/c I’m not a rape survivor? Think again. I AM A RAPE SURVIVOR. Just not jumping on the Hate-Whoopi-Bandwagon.