my hair may be unwashed as well as my body, but i have deoderant on and eye makeup
i may not be the cleanest of individuals today, but i’m not wearing pajama pants or yoga pants (though i don’t do yoga and what the hell kind of mother even wears yoga pants and actually does yoga? if you do, don’t let me know about it because i will probably stab you.)
i’m in jeans today. my skinny ones thankyouverymuch. and a top. not a tshirt. a button-up top.
the lovely thing about having uber short and curly hair is that you can buy this goop that basically just sticks it out all over the place for you and it looks like you had your hair styled when you really just put a bunch of guk in it.
no, i was not paid to discuss the above mentioned hair guk.
point being, i made an effort today. i did. i don’t do it all the time. and some days are better than others.
but today, i made an effort.
well, i guess it’s sort of an effort because it did not include a shower, but ya can’t have it all folks, ya just can’t.
and that’s what i’m starting to see in the blogosphere lately that is kinda getting under my skin. bloggers are wanting it all… ALL. OF. IT. i don’t even know what IT is entirely, but between some posts that i’ve read lately and some tweets that i’ve been keeping up with, i’m noticing a trend that i’m making an effort NOT to be a part of.
you see, there are conferences… and they’re great, from what i’m told. bloggers meet other bloggers… some are told by fans, “don’t be scared of me please, i don’t like stalk you or anything,” and the person behind the keyboard suddenly is in the flesh.
human.
and possibly unshowered and with hair guk in order to make themselves somewhat presentable.
i bought a ticket to an upcoming conference. one that i will not be attending.
no worries. i’m not far from nyc and plan to pop in and see some lovelies for dinner and drinks that weekend.
here’s the thing… i don’t understand social media. i don’t even fully understand the concept of blogging, PR, advertising on one’s blog, monetizing, SEO (i still do not know what that stands for). and i don’t care. i don’t blog for any of that stuff. stats. traffic. whatever.
i barely get by lately with getting a post up a week and perhaps a new bottle of the week every two or so weeks.
perhaps i’m stepping away from blogging for a bit. the online world is looking a bit caddy to me at this very moment. i’m seeing crap posts written by good writers, good people, good bloggers… to pitch something or sell something… gain something more than community and connections.
it’s getting weird. stupid shit is being said and it’s just getting weird. expectations are being placed way the fuck up in the air to a nearly unattainable level and i’m not seeing as much effort put forth when it comes to the connections and community that drew me to this medium in the first place.
some people have been doing this for years, blogging that is… and they’re FANTASTIC at it. these individuals truly change lives, make a difference, and are pleased with the work they do as writers who connect with others by sharing their words online. it’s incredible when i think about blogging like that. and apparently that’s what it once was, according to some veteran bloggers. but i’m not really liking where blogging is headed lately. and perhaps i just caught the blogging bug a little late.
kinda like how i always wanted to be a child of the 70′s and instead was one of the 80′s.
i’m no social media guru. i just write. this is my place to write and share and communicate. unshowered, but with deoderant on, hair goop… and today, eye makeup.
i made an effort… today.
i have all that i want.
do you?
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twice...
I’ve been blogging in one way or another since the late 90′s, back before it was even called blogging. They were just online journals. Writing words for other people to read, but mainly for yourself. When I decided to try to make more of an effort at keeping a blog again last year, it’s just changed. There’s giveaways and reviews and ads and posts talking about PR and what a blogger’s worth and I just, I don’t get it.
C @ Kid Things´s last blog ..For the Love of Sporks
@C @ Kid Things, thanks for that comment. yeah, while i have done a giveaway here and there and just began running ads again (most of which are for free cuz i dig what they’re doing and want to promote them), i do feel like i missed something perhaps “before it was even called blogging” like you mentioned. and it makes me disappointed, at least right now.
I just want to write. That’s all I will ever really want. I lied, I want to read to. I love reading other blogs – but I loathe reading sponsored posts about a product I don’t give a shit about.
Michelle´s last blog ..♥I love contests!
@Michelle, i love this comment so much because it has recently dawned on me how much more reading i want to be doing in order for my writing to go where i want it to… and in order to simply enjoy great writing of others.
Blogging for me first and foremost is about the writing. I love writing and my blog gives me an outlet for that. When I originally started my blog it was originally a site to educate and inform. I didn’t start writing more personal stuff until the last couple of years. I run ads (the don’t pay much!!) because it helps pay the bills associated with blogging. I’ve done a review or two, but mostly on stuff I bought myself and loved and wanted to share with others.
I get what you’re saying. I see so many blog posts and tweets these days that are product driven and promotional. It bugs me. I love reading peoples words from the heart, their loves, their hates, their annoyances, their day to day. That is what this community is about to me. Sharing and being part of something. I hope you keep writing because I adore you and your writing. My feed reader just wouldn’t be the same with you
Lisa´s last blog ..Dental Care During Pregnancy
@Lisa,
i don’t think i am capable of not writing. so don’t worry about not seeing me in your reader… but it’s just something i’ve noticed lately and irks me, just like drivers who sit at a green traffic light because they’re on the phone… HELLO!!! LET’S FOCUS HERE.
I caught the blogging bug a bit late…..Not a great writer, but at least it’s an outlet…..one that I enjoy. Reading and writing are both fun in the blogger world
Rebecca´s last blog ..My Family
@Rebecca, most definitely with you on blogging being an outlet… and a good one, which i think is what seems bothersome to me when i see something that is such a great outlet being geared towards a particular audience or altered in order to make a buck, gain sponsorship, etc…
I don’t like the product promotion posts. I HATE the giveways where people are asked to follow the blog, post about the giveway, tweet about the giveway.
I blog because after reading so many amazing blogs I thought, hey I have some funny stories and maybe somebody out there wants to read them. And even if I am not that interesting to people maybe I can at least make some great friends. Isn’t that the point? To share and build friendships with like minded people?
Heather @ Brace Yourselves´s last blog ..Stomach viruses are from the devil & OMGEEZ MY BABIES ARE 8 MONTHS OLD!!
@Heather @ Brace Yourselves, i know what you mean about the giveaways, and the only reason i know this is because i made the mistake of doing it!!! i have done 2 giveaways and on one of them, i did request a twitter follow, subscribe to my blog, etc… and a fellow blogger basically called me out on the bullshit behind it and i was like “ya know what? you’re so right!” so i edited the giveaway, basically just asked people to leave a comment if they were interested, and it made things so much more fun and exciting because the expectations and obligations were eliminated.
I’m also a latecomer to this blogging thing and I blog for me and for my family and friends who live in the States and abroad ro keep up with my life. I would love to be a ‘successful’ blogger in the sense that I would like to be a good writer……generally however I just waffle
I can’t imagine ever blogging about a product and generally don’t follow blogs that do this!!!
Emma´s last blog ..Apologies and School Trips
@Emma, it’s so awesome getting a perspective from a blogger who is not in the states, because i honestly don’t know how to define the term “successful blogger,” and seeing you comment about it makes me wonder… how is that defined for others?
If I click on a blog and it’s filled with promotions and giveaways, I’m gone. I love love reading blogs filled with interesting perspectives, beautiful thoughts and humor. And I love sharing my thoughts as well and the giddiness I feel when someone comments on my words, definitely makes it all worth it. That’s all I’m here for. I sometimes can’t get over the following some of the bloggers out there have. Their writing isn’t anything special, they don’t write about anything interesting and they go on and on about products I don’t give a shit about. But you know what, if they’re happy with that, great. To each her own!
lukahsmom´s last blog ..When the picture doesn’t tell the story
@lukahsmom, you’re absolutely right. to each their own. that being said, it really resonated with me that you mention what you are “here for…” and how you mention a bloggers following and the amazement behind it. lately, in my opinion, blogging is about numbers… followers… traffic… hits… stats… etc. and i don’t like what i am seeing right now in the blogosphere. but… like you said, to each their own, which i suppose is the beauty behind this all.
Just a name change from above…
dramaformama´s last blog ..When the picture doesn’t tell the story
@dramaformama, name change noted.
interesting post! i’ve been pondering things along these same lines recently. i feel like some of what’s happening with bloggers changing their style – ‘wanting all of it’ as you say – is a weird kind of competition. like, upon seeing the more commercial/lucrative/”successful” blogs people are saying to themselves “hey, I can do that!” and trying to emulate the style of what they see. it does bother me to see people (especially mamas!) back-biting each other, and being insincere on their pages for the sake of trying to build up their site… i’m with you on the fact that blogging in general seems to be drifting into a strange place, a lot of which makes me uncomfortable. all the more reason to stick with what’s REAL, follow your instincts do what it takes to keep integrity alive. if that means retreating a few paces to evaluate and nurture yourself, i think that makes perfect sense. plus if i start to miss you i know you’re only an email away.
p.s. – great job on the skinny jeans and hair product! i love primping and wearing outfits that don’t involve pajamas, but as a mommy i’m totally not above taking a hooker bath with baby wipes and styling my hair in a way that hides the fact it hasn’t been washed in days (a week.)
much love from washington!
xoxo.
@emily bilbrey, i like that you mentioned the competition factor, because i have noticed that but was unable to pinpoint it until you said it. and i suppose there will always be some sort of competition everywhere… people try to out do one another… companies try to out do one another… but for some reason, when i first stumbled upon this whole world of blogging in 2007, when i was pregnant with jackson, i saw it as a virtual way to share, write, and find community.
and maybe it’s because bloggers are just coming down from their most recent conference high, so it’s being talked about incessantly… but the posts and tweets that i’m seeing lately are more commercial and seem to be written with an agenda that i’m not down with.
i guess that’s the thing about social media… it’s always changing, people are always wanting something new… it’s a constant “what’s next?” yet it has the instant gratification factor that the internet brings.
ps- thanks for the props on the skinny jeans and hair product… it may be another day like that today… ha!!! this one will most likely involve a scarf of two. LOL!!!
Cryptic, captivating post. I appreciate your honesty and your determination to stand where you stand and not be led where you don’t want to go… I must say I am curious about what exactly prompted this piece? I don’t pretend to understand social media either. To me the learning curve seems steep and slippery. But, hey, I’m on it.
Love the metaphor of making an effort. And the bit about your skinny jeans
@Aidan Donnelley Rowley @ Ivy League Insecurities, i think you’re right, the learning curve is steep and slippery, but i don’t think it has to be… or maybe if it is, i need to find another curve or path? i dunno. what prompted this piece were some recent tweets i read and posts from bloggers who blog for “the stuff” when they seemed much more genuine before “the stuff” and the promos and the swag.
This was a great post and I think it’s true. Although I am super new to the blogging world and don’t have a clue what I”m doing. I look at some of these big sites and I am like wow how can they accomplish so much and I am in awe. I have even questioned my own reason for blogging and I may get 2 readers a day… But I was blogging what I thought people might want to read… So I took a new look at it this year and I plan to blog for me and if people want to read it great and if they don’t then that’s fine too. It’s still an outlet for me where I can say what I want and get it off my chest. I think it’s encouraging to see someone of your awesomeness keeping it real.
And you are so lucky you can rock skinny jeans they just make my feet look huge. =-)
Jodee´s last blog ..Pray for Layla Grace
@Jodee, aww sweets, you’re so genuinely kind and i appreciate that. i’m glad you enjoyed this post and found yourself relating to it. i know i’m not the only one out there who is feeling this way lately.
as for the skinny jeans, they make my size 10 big ass feet look huge, but i’ll be damned if that keeps me from rockin’ them while i can!!!
Sorry to be so late to the comment party, Nic, but I’m grateful to you for this piece.
I have only been blogging for a few months and have been lucky in that time to find a wonderful community of writers, mostly women, whose words I cherish – both in their own posts, and in their comments on mine. I feel like I’ve found a group of people to whom I can say things that I shy away from in real life.
But, fundamentally, I still don’t get blog culture specifically and social media in general and haven’t been able to figure out why some blogs are huge and why others aren’t.
But. You, my friend, have a voice that’s fresh and real – and I hope you don’t silence it here out of frustration over what you see elsewhere. After all, maybe you and the like-minded commenters here can start a new trend?
Kristen @ Motherese´s last blog ..Changing My Tune
@Kristen @ Motherese,
my friend… me, silenced? 
not possible. but i will say i have gained great insight from taking breaks from blogging here and there. there is something to be said about closing the laptop for a bit in the hopes of gaining clarity. but silenced? never. 
thank you, my sweet.
Don’t judge the whole orchard based on a few bad apples, Nic. Yes, there’s a lot of materialistic crap out there, but that’s only because there’s many MORE people blogging now than when I started. The personal blogs you’re talking about are still out there.
That said, if I could make a living writing whatever I want to write? I’d be all over that shit.
Karl´s last blog ..Fine
@Karl, thanks karl, i always appreciate your input. and i am trying not to judge the whole based on a few bad apples (which i’ve been accused of being myself). that being said, i’m seeing more crap than i have in a while and felt the need to say so.
Just keep doing what you’re doing and be judicious in what you keep in your feedreader.
Karl´s last blog ..Fine
Nic
I don’t get the whole blog thing for profit….I mean I don’t judge it because I really don’t get it! I like to think of my blog as my brain’s playground where I invite the other kids on the block to come and play….it’s my private journal for the whole damn world to see.
I am so scared that if I connect it with money that the mojo will go bye bye. So, I just put up whatever the hell I want. The comments and self-satisfaction of accomplishment is payment enough (gaggggg, boy that was CHEEZY!)
LisaB´s last blog ..Confessions of a Selfish Traveling Single Working Mother Obsessed with Blogging