i’m too lazy to google blossom’s real name
ok, so i’m on the porch of my friend’s new home, facing the water, sipping coffee… and sweating like a pig because they are still getting air conditioners installed. it’s a GREAT home and totally reminded me of our home in jacksonville that i miss so desperately. i think i love this home and i’m so excited for my friend because i know she will truly make it THEIR HOME.
our first house was a train wreck when we moved in it. seriously, it looked as though a train had wrecked inside of the house. paul thought i was nuts (duh!!!) and i was all “oh look at the potential… we could paint this… and knock out this wall… and landscape here…” and paul was all ::WONKY EYE:: “are you fucking kidding me?!?” but over time, we made it our own and redid every single room.
so, i’m on my friend’s porch, dripping with under-the-boob-sweat, and our little men are playing together and scaring the family cat and my friend and i start discussing potty training. her little boy is 2 and some change and jackson just turned 2 at the end of april and apparently once you hit the 2 year mark, you start talking potty shit.
we’re not “training” like reading books and going sans diaper and sticker charting and big boy underpants, yet… jackson has a potty that he likes and he sits on it when either paul or i are on our toilet. jackson LOVES to give you toilet paper and LOVES to flush. cuz ya know, that’s a very satisfying feeling, to flush the toilet and watch the contents go down the drain.
my friend’s potty “training” is similar as of now, and this summer, she plans to tackle it a little more strategically. so yay for that.
at this point in our convo, she tells me that she has a friend who potty trained her 18 month old. cool. groovy. major props. i couldn’t do it… but i applaud you, my friend’s friend.
she then asks me the question that caused me to nearly drop my coffee cup…
“have you heard of those moms who potty train their infants? like their baby-babies?”
my silence and eyes popping out of my sockets cued her to continue… and she told me of someone she knew who had informed her of how she had her baby (BABY) potty trained at 4 months of age.
WHUT THE WHUT WHUT?!?!??!
my friend, not at all surprised by my surprise, goes into explicit yet informative detail about how her friend had picked up on cues and facial expressions her baby would make that were indicative of an oncoming bowel movement.
ok, i’m with ya… nodding head… recalling jackson’s scrunched up face and grunts…
my friend then tells me that after witnessing those cues from her baby, the mother then held her 4 month old over the toilet and that was how the child was potty trained.
WHUT THE WHUT WHUT?!!?!
so THEN my friend tells me that after her friend relayed this info to her, she started looking info up and found out that blossom… you remember blossom… the tv show… teenage chick who wore the denim hat with the big ass flower on it all the time… had a best friend named six… ok, i’m getting off track. ok, well, blossom apparently did this with her baby(ies) i don’t know how many children blossom has… AND since no underwear is made to fit infants (BECAUSE THEY’RE USUALLY IN DIAPERS) she made loin cloths for her baby(ies) in lieu of underwear.
alright, so if blossom can do this, i’m totally trying it out with our next kid, because then i figure by the time that kid is crawling, having been totally potty trained by 4 months of age via loin cloth underwear, i can train him/her to uncork a bottle of wine… or at the very least, start the coffee brewing in the early morning hours.
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22 Responses to “i’m too lazy to google blossom’s real name”
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twice...
Yea, I read about that when I was pregnant with Isabella and thought about trying it, but it’s way ……waaaaaayyyyy too much work on my part. An infant isn’t potty trained, their parents are potty crazy, or something like that.
Rebecca´s last blog ..Memorial Day
oh oh oh… if you find where you read that, will you link it here please? i’m FASCINATED by this now.
Wasn’t her name something Bialik or something crazy like that? Now i gotta google.
miyam bialik. wow. i amaze myself for remembering that.
anyway, i hope this is true. let me know because IF we ever have more, i’m gonna be doing the same thing!
Becky´s last blog ..Shredding
haha! well, the thing about blossom (her earl name is mayim bialis, btw) (i’m a huge geek) (and totally knew that) (shut up) is, she said her kid was “dry” by ten months. meaning she did endure 10 months of poop & pee allll over the place at least some of the time. but people do practice this kind of potty training, and there’s a whole movement behind it (heh, movement). it’s called elimination training:
http://www.ivillage.com/infant-elimination-training-101/6-a-144979
personally WAY too much work for me, plus my experience with poppy has led me to believe it would never work – i have given her tons of diaper-free time starting very early, probably more than what’s typical, and i can honestly say there is rarely a cue that tells me when she’s gonna go. maybe a split second beforehand she’ll get that little twinkle in her eye but it’s not much of a warning – then she unleashes whatever she’s got! interesting idea though, i can totally see who rad it would be to have your kid turn one and not be in diapers! (-:
cute post, as usual. loves!
~em
emily bilbrey´s last blog ..wordless wednesday, number twenty-two.
I love that you brought this up because I read a story about this the other day. A woman in a far, far away land was doing this with her baby and of course, us here were so amazed by it. I googled it and was surprised that isn’t that uncommon. Granted, I don’t know if I could have the patience and time when they are that young. I don’t even have it now with my 2 year old. Here’s a link to what I found.
http://www.parentingscience.com/infant-toilet-training.html
Amber´s last blog ..Toddler Years
Mayim Bialik FTW!!!!!!!!!! Ok when you get done with that come on down here and get Mas to poop in the potty. Thanks.
Lu´s last blog ..Waiting
Ya, I’ve heard of this craziness. I can’t remember where I read about it, but I remember my eyes bugging out and thinking what the what!!!
We are in the midst of potty training with Maya. She wears big girl underwear at home and pull ups when we go out. I have to say I am loving the major reduction in dirty diaper/pull up changing I have to do now. Makes all the effort and frustrations worth it.
Lisa´s last blog ..Our Kickoff to Summer
THANK YOU THANK YOU to those of you leaving links with info about this. i’m stoked to read up on this entirely foreign concept i was privy to learn about this morning.
cheers!
It sounds lovely to get the potty training accomplished earlier. But isn’t being a new mom hard enough without adding the stress of trying to potty train a newborn that can’t even talk. That’s just weird to me. Or maybe I’m just too damn lazy. LOL
Michelle @ Mommy Loves Stilettos´s last blog ..♥You Are Still Older Than Me
Personally I think potty training a 4 month old is bullshit…that’s all I have to say about it!
LMAO!!!! i love you and cannot wait to see you next week.
Here you go and you’re welcome. MWAH!
http://www.holisticmoms.org/
Let me know how the whole infant opening wine bottles thing goes…cause that would be awesome!
Sunday Stilwell´s last blog ..My zoo takes on the Maryland Zoo and I didn’t even lose a kid.
BAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHA
I just snorted my unusually strong coffee all through my nose. I’ve also heard that they do that with their babies in Africa … the early potty training…not the wine and coffee.
Think of the possibilities…if only babies could earn their keep
Been up since 4:30 so I’m probably laughing a little harder than everyone else.
LOVE YA
hey mama! nice to see you on here… you beat me by an hour. jackson’s been up since 5:45. OH WAIT, you’re on central time. so we’re even… kinda. ok, not really. you have a newborn… but you see what i mean.
shit, i need coffee.
Well, I suppose if you have to be famous for something after your sitcom gets cancelled, it might as well be this sort of thing.
Good luck . . .
So, let’s try this again . . .
I remember that show. Barely. I guess if you’ve got to be famous for something after your sitcom ends its run, it might as well be something like this.
At four months, though?! Hardly seems possible. Is a child that age coordinated enough to climb on the pot, any pot, and do their business? Is this just a case of someone *saying* a child is trained, and yet the parent is still doing all the work?
Interesting . . .
oh, i love that last question… “is this just a case of someone *saying* a child is trained, and yet the parent is still doing all the work?”
for the record, i love getting dad perspectives on this shit (no pun intended.)
I could never do that haha. But if you do it for the second child, I will worship you even more lmao.
jess; [the bottle chronicles]´s last blog ..my love’s 24th birthday {& a post-surgery update}
Yeah, I heard about this a while back. If it works for other people, then okee dokee. But, I just can’t figure out the logistics of any of that. My son just turned 2, and he still isn’t giving any cues, facial or otherwise, when he goes. If I had tried this method of potty training, I’m sure my carpets and furniture would be covered in stains.
Beth in SF´s last blog ..An Unsolicited Plug for Huggies
I know it sounds crazy, but when I was little, my mom started training me at 6 months. I was full on potty-trained no accident whatsoever like an older kid by the time I was 2. I asked her why she started so early, and she had said that she hadn’t known any better. That she just went by the advice she was given… and voila. Seems strange, but hey it worked. I think it’s cool to just go along with whatever your kid can handle, though… whether that is six months or 3 years.
Kellee´s last blog ..Wordless Wednesday Diptych #24 & #25: Juicy & Complicated
It’s possible that I’m the laziest potty-trainer in the whole world. I don’t care enough about it to train a 4 month old. But I did love watching Blossom and Six banter when I was like, 13 (and potty trained)
We’re (sort of) potty training boy #2 (pun intended) over here and I prefer just letting him go naked. Works like a charm.
Heather of the EO´s last blog ..This dentist thing ain’t half bad
lol *i* have not done this, but have heard of it and seen it in action. it seems easier if you’re on baby #1 and at home b/c otherwise you’re trekking off to classes and play dates and pre school, oh my! it *is* interesting though, right? in other news: i loved blossom. she rocked those big flowers!
btw, i found you through scary mommy and am glad that i did!
Minnesota Mamaleh´s last blog ..Minnesota Mamaleh: High Love, High Control