“mom, i want a movie pleeeeeeaaaase…”

“ok.  thank you for asking so nicely.  which movie do you want?”

(turn on netflix)

“mom, i want a purple lollipop pleeeeeeeaaaase…”

“ok fine, but first just tell me what movie you want.”

(netflix menu pops up)

“mom i want the kevin movie.”  (translation: i want to watch UP)

“alrighty, kevin movie it is.”

(goes to pantry to retrieve purple lollipop. opening credits of movie play in background.)

“MOM IT’S MR. FREDRICKSON!!!!!”

“alright bud, here’s your purple lollipop.”

“no, i don’t want that.”

::sigh::

“ok well you just said you wanted a purple lollipop.”

“mom, i want a bluuuuuuuue one pleeeeeeeeaaaaase?”

“ok but that’s it. no more lollipop exchanges. no returns on this one.”

(goes and gets blue lollipop. grateful that dum dums come in ENORMOUS bags.)

“mom i want a chocolate.”

“WHAT?!?!”

“i want a chocolate like kevin. kevin likes the chocolate.”

(kevin is a bird in the movie he’s watching, which PS: if you haven’t see UP, something is wrong with you.)

“no jackson. kevin has the chocolate. jackson has the blue lollipop.”

“mom, i can have a orange?”

(hmm, sounds good. i kinda want one myself. peels orange.)

“mom, i want THE BABY orange pleeeeeeaaaase.” (translation: clementine)

“okie doke.”

(peels clementine)

“orange is JUICY mom.”

“yes, baby it is.”

“i’m all done?”

“you just had one bite, what do you mean you’re done?”

“mom, i want the builder movie.”

::rolls eyes::

“no way dude. enough with bob the builder.”

“mom, i want the builder movie with the roads.”

“jackson, no. you asked to watch the kevin movie, so that’s what is staying on.”

“MOM I WANT THE BUILDER MOVIE WITH THE ROADS!!!!!!!”

“no. that’s not how we ask for things. don’t yell again or you’ll have to get a time out.”

“hmpf…” (followed by pouty face and furrowed brow.)

“mom, i can play with my diggers?”

“yes baby, you can play with your diggers and trucks.”

“mom, i can play diggers with bob movie on?”

::BLINK::

::BLINK BLINK::

“no, jackson. we’re not changing the movie again. you can play with your toys while the kevin movie is on.”

“ok mom.”

“um, i want a gara bar mom.” (translation: granola bar)

“ok, how about we take our granola bar to the table and do a puzzle?”

“OK MOM!!!! THE FARM PUZZLE WITH THE TRACTORS AND THE COW GOES ‘MOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO.’”

“yes baby, we can do the farm puzzle.”

(open box of puzzle pieces, dump puzzle pieces on table, granola bar remnants litter the table)

“mom…”

(starting to sort puzzle pieces)

“yes jackson, what’s up?”

“mom i want the fire truck puzzle.”