i remember riding carpool to school each morning and there being one mother who drove carpool who always put her makeup on in the car.

at the time, being the age of a 3rd grader with the infinite wisdom that comes with being in elementary school, i can remember myself watching from the back seat of this woman’s volvo and thinking “she has no time to do her makeup at home?”

it was unusual for 3rd grade me to imagine my mom doing her makeup and readying herself for the day anywhere other than her bathroom.

i’ve carried that with me over the years, though i never realized it until this morning, as i walked jackson down to the car holding his little hand in mine… and in the other hand, carrying my makeup case.

i work better when i’m showered and dressed for the day (yes, this includes makeup). i function better, i feel like i serve my purpose with a bit more strength and umpf. i tackle my day with the some gusto when i’m armed in something more than pajama pants.

now don’t get me wrong, there are plenty of days for pajama pants, or no pants for that matter. but for me, i cope better with the day-to-day happenings of life and parenthood when i treat it for what it is… a job.

so this morning, being a school day for jackson, i prepared myself for work. but i was dragging. really REALLY dragging. jackson and i have battled a cold for 2 solid weeks and this week, my cold manifested itself into a sinus infection and made me its bitch.

it was one of those mornings where my head was so congested that i had to sit on the toilet seat to blow dry my hair. i needed a break from standing.

(this is also why we need a double vanity with those lovely cushioned seats that you see the women in soap operas resting their bums on as they daintily apply rouge.)

needless to say, i knew i wouldn’t be able to tackle makeup and get jackson to school on time without taking more than like 4 breaks.

jackson came in to find me in the bathroom, bringing me my boots, very excited to be going back to school after missing a week for being sick, and i did what i never thought i would do…

i grabbed my makeup bag to take with me in the car.

i applied makeup at stop lights (only the red ones) and i must say that i did a decent job playing car-makeup-applier-person. i had anticipated losing an eye or mistaking my lipstick for powder.

and as i readied myself for the day in my car, my mind started to wonder about coping mechanisms and how people make it through their day, everyday.

it’s not easy. life is hard. jobs are a struggle. relationships take work. parenting is difficult. (fill in the blank with your agonizing adjective.)

there was a girl who lived on the same hall as me, my freshman year in college who always carried a funsized pack of m&ms in her pocket. i didn’t know her well since she lived on the other side of the hall from me, but we had a couple of 101 classes together and over time, i took note of the funsized m&ms.

i can only surmise that the pack of m&ms she kept in her pocket was her coping mechanism… or she was diabetic.

my coping mechanism is putting myself together as much as possible every monday, wednesday, and friday. jackson’s school days are my days that i really try to have my shit together. that’s what works for me.

and ultimately, those of us who are parents, who are working, who are living and breathing and dealing with what this world throws at us, are trying to figure out… what works for me?

i finished off my makeup application in the parking lot of the coffee shop where i come to work after dropping off jackson at school. after putting on my mascara, i closed my makeup bag and tossed it on the passenger seat of my car.

finished… and ready to begin.

then i looked briefly to my right and in the car next to me was a man in a suit with a newspaper open across his steering wheel, readying himself for his day.

and i had to laugh.