(((breathe)))
i’ve been feeling really overwhelmed lately. just lots going on all at once… and ALL NEEDING MY IMMEDIATE ATTENTION. and it gets piled on and piled on and then the pile gets higher and higher… and at this very moment, my pile is too high. so typically i would prioritize and just work my way down the list of things to get done. except this time is different; i have multiple lists… in fact, i have lists reminding myself to list something on my list.
parenting lately is overwhelming me. jackson, right now, is overwhelming me. juggling married life with a baby is overwhelming me. money issues are overwhelming me. we leave saturday for a week at the beach for a family reunion, and just preparing for the travel is overwhelming me.
i’m overwhelmed. yet still trying to breathe.
i promise, i’m going somewhere with this…
so i was talking with a friend of mine the other day about how i am feeling overwhelmed. eventually our conversation turned to medication, and it dawned on me that no matter who i have discussions with regarding stress or feeling overwhelmed,9 times out of 10 medication creeps into the conversation. more specifically, anti-anxiety medication.
hmmm... what to do... what to do... (ps- like the dark circles under my eyes? yea! that's hot!)
so my next step was to go twitter with it… that’s right, i went all out there and had KILLER conversations this morning with strangers friends about meds, anti-anxiety meds, why, why not, and everything in between. the responses i have gotten today have been overwhelming (damnit there’s that word again) and the candor is remarkable.
my first thought was to go about this post all researchy about it… anti-anxiety meds. what one’s options are… side effects… stats on who uses them (particularly parents and new parents)… etc.
screw that.
so, i’m going open forum on y’all… i’m putting this post out in the hopes of continuing some incredible conversation, gaining insight and perspective and support, because apparently this whole parenting thing is really hard.
anxiety?! what anxiety?! i don't have anxiety! why are you looking at me?! (again, dark circles... HELLO!)
so, post a comment if you so desire with your story, with info, with links, anonymously if you prefer, layin’ it all out there if you prefer. if you want to stay anonymous, please feel free to do, or you can always email me.
are you pro-meds? anti-meds? why/why not? what’s your experience like with/without? do you think you should be taking something but don’t for whatever reason?
consider the forum open… it’s all you! and it’s all appreciated. one thing i am learning about all of this is that it’s something that is perhaps not discussed enough. of course please be respectful. there are some incredible people out there with incredible things to say.
so…. ”twalk amongst yoselves…”
the meanie weanie
one would think that i’d be stoked to be weaning jackson from his bottles now that he is 13 months old… and i think i am. yes, yes, i am. wait! jackson just started enjoying his bottles. shit! that throws a wrench into everything.
given our history with breast, bottle, and everything in between, i think back now and remember counting down the months, weeks, days until jackson’s 1st birthday when i could “officially” say PEACE OUT to the bottle.
i envisioned myself throwing the bottles at a wall while screaming out in the most animalistic cry. i imagined myself emptying drawers of bottles, bottle systems, nipples, etc, into garbage bags and yelling “FREE AT LAST! FREE AT LAST!”
i have been so ready to get rid of jackson’s bottle for so long.
and now he has begun to enjoy them. seriously. how do i take that away?
paul and i discussed weaning and we’re currently reading different methods, etc… but ultimately it’ll come down to us making a decision in the hopes that we’re making the “right” decision for our child.
a few weeks ago, jackson was taking 4 bottles a day.
i never thought i’d be able to say that.
he’s now weaned down to 3 bottles a day… and my goal this week is to work my way down to 2 bottles a day by friday.
i don’t want to be the meanie weanie when it comes to this process. i am terrified to go “cold turkey” with this bottle thing, but some books suggest it.
for some reason, i feel like these books weren’t written for children like mine…
so if you have suggestions, please send them my way. at the moment, jackson is taking 3 bottles a day, each one with 8 ounces of whole milk.
shit, i never thought i’d be able to say that either.
the first bottle is given to him before he goes down for his morning nap at 9:30, the second bottle before his afternoon nap at 2, and the final bottle before he goes down for bed at 7 pm. so yes, there is an obvious relationship that has been made between nice, warm bottle and sleepy time.
he’s doing well with eating throughout the day, though i’m finding he is a definite snacker, like his mama. (i eat two lunches a day just to give you an idea… the first is at 10 am the second is usually after jackson goes down for his afternoon nap. i eat constantly. no lie.) and jackson pretty much eats when i eat and what i eat. so that’s good. really good. i’m proud of him.
but this bottle weaning stuff has my head spinning… i don’t want to traumatize my child anymore than he already has been in terms of feedings.
suggestions… advice… weaning stories… i welcome them all.
feed me
not yet ready to write about yesterday’s walk for maddie, i sit at my new mac book (paul’s birthday gift to me, hell yea!) and ponder what to post…
Have a Sip
