a case of the crazies
in an attempt to prove myself a super hero and get over my knee injury, i went sans vicodin yesterday afternoon and evening. i have a tendency to do this when overcoming an injury.
i sum up my super-healing powers (paul thinks i have said powers) and prove myself to be a rockstar. this occurred when i was in the hospital, post c-section. i took nothing other than an 800 mg ibuprofen. i know. i’m a little kooky when it comes to this… a little competitive… and quite possibly on the verge of being certifiably nuts.
so last night, i go sans vicodin, and instead i ice my knee while watching a movie with paul and enjoying some good brews.
i know, i know, you’re not supposed to drink when taking pain killers… but i hadn’t taken one since yesterday morning. i was in the clear. totally in the clear.
or so i thought…
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this morning paul asks, “do you remember asking me ‘whose tiara are you wearing’ last night?”
i respond with, “you’re joking right. i mean seriously. i didn’t even take a vicodin!!! c’mon!!!”
“so what else did i say?” i ask paul, feeling like he will soon have me committed for my sleep crazies.
paul says, ” well, i was like, ‘what do you mean?’ and you said ‘yeah, just check the time and date on the tiara to see whose it is.‘”
i went back to sleep. my husband laughed at me and then rolled back over.
great, just another crazy sleep story to add to my collection.
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in terms of my knee, i’m totally challenging myself and going sans vicodin… reason being that sunday is octoberfest, and dammit-to-hell, i’m going. we live within walking distance (though this may be more of a negative than a positive in my case) and i’m determined to go and partake in the beers and sausages.
today will be my trial period… going sans vicodin. i mean, it’s for a good cause…
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so who lost their tiara and lent it to paul last night???

analyze this
i just woke up (literally still rubbing the crusties out of my eyes, have not brushed my teeth yet). the reason i just woke up… because i was talking in my sleep.
so here’s what i was dreaming… indulge me and let me know your thoughts, cuz it’s friday and i have nothing better to write about.
setting: movie rental store (no particular one but it was in the middle of nowhere.)
i’m standing in a ridiculously long line of people waiting to get in this store and use a coupon to purchase a reese witherspoon movie. paul and i had been given a coupon from paul’s aunt andi to use for this movie. andi is in line with me, holding her grandson (close in age to the magoo) and her other grandson (3 years old) is running around in circles. paul is no where to be found.
me: andi, why are we here again? (looking around at all these fools in line).
andi: the boys will LOVE this movie, and plus we have a coupon!!!
me: (stunned, but whatever and continuing to look at the masses of people) alright.
time passes, the line barely moves, we slowly approach the opening to the movie store which only consists of one window through which you make your movie purchase.
me: where’s paul?
andi: at the meeting.
me: meeting?
andi: hun, at the governor’s mansion… (looking at me like i’m insane for not knowing).
me: am i supposed to be there?
andi: no love, you’re right where you’re supposed to be… getting this movie for the boys.
i nod my head in agreement… sort of.
the weather starts to get bad and paul suddenly shows up to continue standing with us in line.
me: hey! i missed you!
paul: i gotta pee.
me (looking around): i don’t know where to tell you to go hun… how was the meeting? why did you have a meeting at the governor’s mansion anyway?
paul: i can’t talk about it. maybe if you had BEEEN THERE you would know how it went.
paul walks away in search of a restroom. i still have not approached the head of the line to retrieve the reese witherspoon movie. the magoo proceeds to take the shit of his life, which explodes out of his diaper, up the back of his shirt, to his shoulders. paul’s aunt andi has somehow disappeared.
me (looking at the magoo): great, thanks man. just what i needed.
jackson laughs maniacally and people start to stare not only because of jackson’s crazed hysteria, but because the disgusting odor is spreading. i have no where to change him. no car. nothing. there is nothing around me but this movie store window and this godforsaken line of people. paul returns.
me: oh good, you’re back. did you find a restroom? is there a changing table? the magoo shit his life away out of his diaper.
paul: i have to get back to the governor’s mansion.
rain/sleet/snowish stuff starts to fall…
me: ARE YOU KIDDING?? YOU’RE JUST GOING TO LEAVE ME HERE??
paul leaves. shitty magoo and i go to retrieve our reese witherspoon movie (FINALLY) but then we’re told that our coupon has expired. we have to pay for the movie (i don’t remember how much.)
i turn to leave the movie store window and paul appears again…
me: is it snowing?
paul: yup. has been.
paul again disappears, i take the still shitty magoo out of line WITH our movie and search of a car, for anything.
i slip and fall on a curb. magoo is fine, but i can’t move. an ambulance comes, places me on a stretcher…
paul reapprears.
me: is it snowing?
paul: yup. has been.
END OF DREAM.
so i wake myself up because i was talking in my sleep. paul looks at me and says, “did you sleep ok last night?” and i say, “i think so but i just had the weirdest dream.” he responds with, “yeah, you’ve been talking for like the last 10 minutes.”
so hit me with it… what was this dream all about… get creative…









