well tomorrow is the BIG day… the little man will be arriving in just about 24 hours from now. hard to imagine, but at the same time, we are so ready for him to be here and in our lives. our families are arriving to jacksonville today, and paul and i are so excited for that. it’ll be great knowing that they are here and seeing their excitement this afternoon.

the weekend was great for us. we laid low for the most part, just getting things wrapped up around the house. i think it was actually paul’s nesting that kinda kicked in. he was spring cleaning, more or less, with little projects that he had been meaning to work on. yesterday he mentioned that he thought it was the dad in him…. wanting to fix everything before the baby arrives.

i was a little anxious this weekend, knowing that it was another full moon. a while back i had a dream that i gave birth on the 20th, so that number had been stuck in my mind for quite some time, and then once i found out that the 20th was a full moon, i started to worry. there was no action last night, except for the baby moving that much lower in my pelvis, making me feel like those bones are going to snap in 1/2.

one more day…… one more day…… i keep telling myself.

paul is heading to work for a little bit this morning, just to make sure that everything is good to go for his 2 weeks of baby leave. he’ll be home later this morning to take me to my pre-op appointment. then we’ll be home for the rest of today, packing and greeting our families.

i have a feeling i won’t sleep a wink tonight…. don’t worry folks, we’re bringing the camera and laptop to the hospital to keep the blog as updated as possible. please keep us in your thoughts and prayers. the little man will be arriving very shortly!!!

here we go!!!!!

we will be snuggling with our little bundle!!! that was the very first thought in my head this morning when i woke up. “he will be here…. paul and i will be parents.” goodness, that thought just overwhelms me. i am sitting at my laptop right now and i don’t even know what to write because i’m so beside myself with…. everything…. joy (of course), anxiety, excitement, terror, giddyness, amazement…. WOW!!!!

i had my last regular doctor’s check up today, and the gate is still closed. no action, no dilation, no effacement, NUTHIN!!! hooray for that. i’m not even contracting. homeboy is just chillin in there and putting on some serious poundige until his birthday comes. i did however gain 3 lbs in the last week (ha!!!) which now puts me at 25 total lbs gained. my blood pressure was about as perfect as it can be at 122/70 and the baby’s heart rate was wonderful as well. all in all things are fabulous for the little man and i, with the exception of his insane size and the fact that i feel like he’s going to ninja kick his way out of my belly whenever he moves, which is constantly.

i am very VERY ready to have this child out of my body. of course i want to meet him and see him and hold him, etc etc…. selfishly, i want him out because he is so big and i am so uncomfortable. i have officially moved into the guest bedroom, which makes me so sad. paul and i have to sleep apart from each other enough, but to do that now, when he’s home just pains me. my heart burn and acid reflux is just horrible with the baby being so big and heavy, so i have to sleep practically up-right to have any sort of relief. the glider chair we have would be a perfect solution except again, the baby is so big and heavy, that i need to be supported (ok, flanked) by pillows on each side of me so that he doesn’t pull me from side to side when he leans. the numerous pillows i use of course would not fit in our glider chair…. thus, i am in the guest bedroom, in all my pregnant glory.

i’m not going too far these days, partially because i am slower than a tortoise on a good day, and partially because i’m a little scared of going out and something happening. i can’t drive anywhere in my car without mom saying “be careful,” so i know other people are thinking i shouldn’t be going far right now too. i made a big trip to the grocery store today, stocking up on essentials. afterwards i was on the couch for an hour until my doctor’s appointment. hopefully the rest of this week will go by quickly so i don’t go too stir crazy.

my pre-op appointment is on monday. 95% of that will be paperwork, signing off that i give consent for my doctor to perform surgery, etc, etc…. she’ll do a short check up on me and the baby, and that’ll be it. tuesday we will have a baby boy!!!!

please keep the thoughts and prayers coming…. especially that “the gate” remains closed.

i guess this is where i write about the “purpose” of this site… this blog… this journal. originally i started it as a way to communicate with family members, knowing we would be literally on the other side of the world, in japan, with our newly born precious son. so the blog began when i was pregnant in ’07. the sonogram pictures commenced, the expanding belly pictures, etc… webcams were bought in preparation for our around-the-world-communication, and we geared ourselves up to go… to japan. friggin japan.

and obviously if you’ve read this far, you’ve also read the challenges we faced once jackson was born, the challenges he faced upon being allergic to my breast milk… the impending reflux… the teaching oneself NOT to eat because of the pain and torture it provided him.

so, why is my bottle up? here’s how i see it… if jackson can refuse my boob, then his bottle, endure two hospitalizations, a feeding tube for 8 weeks, and then proceed to spend weeks vomiting on me profusely whenever he feels like it… would your wine bottle not be up too???

i rest my case. cheers!

so, what’s your story? i’m a writer, a reader, a tattooed liberal, a wino. married to a navy pilot who had to take an office job at the naval academy in order for our son who doesn’t eat to receive proper pediatric care. jackson has cyclic vomiting; and after being allergic to my breast milk and having horrible reflux, he taught himself not to eat.

and the title? ah yes, “mybottlesup” came from my husband. brilliant in my mind since our son a) refused my boob and then his bottle, and b) drove me to a more intimate relationship with my wine bottle. “mybottlesup” also stands for how my time is up, i am fed up, and i’ve had it up (to here).

are you a raging alcoholic? raging? maybe. alcoholic? nope… and i am not condoning alcoholism as a way to cope with life once you have a baby. i’m just saying that some days i find that it helps to turn the wine bottle up and pour myself a glass.

CHEERS!!!

we’re at the final countdown!!! 10 days until the little man joins us and we are beside ourselves with excitement these days. as much as this seems unreal to think that paul and i are so close to becoming parents, the reality of things creeps in here and there. i found myself marking days off my calendar this week, and on saturday and sunday of next week i wrote “LAST BABY-LESS WEEKEND EVER” in big bold letters. that certainly gave us a reality check. i find myself asking paul, “well, what should we do?? i feel like we need to go do something that we won’t be able to do once the baby arrives.” then of course reality creeps back in and paul does landscaping for the majority of the day. ha!!! it’s great though… the moments of sheer excitement (mixed with a little bit of panic i think) and the moments of logic and reality hitting us, saying, “it won’t be long now…”

i have gotten a burst of energy within the last week that has been absolutely wonderful. a few weeks ago, i found myself having 1 good day (filled with errand running and spontaneous energy) followed by 2 days of couch-recooperation. this past week i have felt so great though, very energized, somewhat rested (though i’m hardly sleeping), and really able to enjoy each day to the fullest. yesterday in target, the cashier asked me when i was due, and when i told her “in 11 days,” she said “ohmygosh, you need to get out of here and get in bed before that baby falls out in the parking lot!!!” i cracked up but then realized that she was serious and thinking that i really needed to be bed-ridden at this point in time. this final burst of energy when i am absolutely enormous has been nice though. let’s hope it continues through next week too.

the little man had an estimated fetal weight check this week… incase you haven’t yet heard, this porker of our’s weighed in at 8 lbs 11 oz on wednesday. ha!!!! no wonder his japanese ninja kicks hurt me so much. once paul and i got over the initial shock of how big this baby will be, we decided to have some fun and started a pool with each of our families to see what the birth weight will be. there are some great guesses from low-ballers coming in with a little over 9 lbs (which he could very well be right now) to high-ballers at well over 10 lbs. i can’t help but wonder if paul’s son will beat him out, since paul was 10 lb 5 oz at birth. we’ll know soon enough, i suppose.

paul is doing well and has one week of class left. yay!!! i know the alarm clock has become his sworn enemy over the last 2 weeks, going off every morning at 4:45. selfishly, i have been so glad to have him home in the early afternoons though. it’s really allowed us some down-time together that we don’t get with his regular work schedule. he’s been such a help to me especially lately… whether it’s been fork-lifting me off the couch, emptying the dishwasher because i can’t bend that far anymore, taking care of the dog, grabbing my cell phone when it rings in the other room and i can’t get to it in time… he’s been great. i was just asking him if he thought he would rub my belly out of habit once the baby is born. he said “nah, i’ll have the little man to hold and rub on.” i thought that was cute.

we see dr. thomas on tuesday afternoon and hope to get through one last week of no action. i’ll be sure to post after that visit and let everyone know what’s going on. until then, here’s a pic of me today at 38 weeks, sporting a new haircut, ready to enjoy the summer with our baby!!!